This will probably be my last post on LJ for a while unless I have less than frustrating access in India.
My flight to India is in a few hours and I'm freaking out about it!
I HATE FLYING! Really. Last time I flew I snapped a facial muscle and my face was paralyzed for a month. It sucked big time.

The ferrets are in their temporary home, James is set up at the grandparents, and we're pretty much all packed up. I need to take Vesper (fishie) to my moms and then it's all waiting.

Tonight I'm staying at my moms and Jamie is staying at his parents with James. We're leaving for the airport at 3:30am.
I'm going to relax in a nice hot bubble bath and then stay up watching movies on TV until it's time to go.

Have a good month everyone! :D

<3

The Visas for India are approved! Toronto really delivered when they promised to get it done fast. Jamie and James will be home tomorrow just after noon! I'm so excited! We're out a lot of money for this trip now so I'm glad it's actually happening. We'll be gone from Nov 2 to the 30th!  

I spent the whole evening with Sean. He called me early this morning and I drove him to class. Later that night he took me out (he paid) to see Zombieland and we had a good time watching the movie. After we came back to the apartment and got drunk, talked about our usual. He asked me to go to Toronto in a few weeks to see Skinny Puppy with him but I'll be in India then! He just left to go home and I'm going to bed. I had a nice time seeing people while Jamie was away and having some freedom but I am definitely ready for them to be home again!

I still have to tidy this place up before I go pick them up tomorrow. And now I can work Halloween with no problems at all! That is IF I'm working. Since I quit no one has spoken to me about it and on the phone my boss said she'll "need to find someone to cover my shifts". I don't know if that means my remaining shifts or the ones after my two weeks. I called her more than once with no answer. Annoying. 

Last night was definitely alive! I had so much fun and screamed all night.
Tonight will be a late night up again, this time with Sean. We'll have talks in cold back alleys about life and love and mysteries. We'll get angry over animal rights and the cards life and death deal out. We'll wish we were in a city with a stronger movement.

I miss my lover and I miss my son. At the same time it's nice to have this time to be my own person again. Maybe I can find parts of who I was  and put myself back together again. Wouldn't it be nice...to see myself again.
I'm on the phone with Jamie right now and James is laughing in the back!

Edit:

Sean got called into work so I saw Tab instead. We went for a walk and snuggled together like we did when we were kids and watched movies. It was lovely! That girl I really love. She's like the female version of Bradley to me. Both of them close friends my whole life, years and years of stories with them. They're two of the few constants I have and rely on.

I miss Jamie so much. I almost cried on the phone listening to James (he was trying to make words).
I want to bury my face in Jamies neck and I can't shake the feeling of sleeping alone tonight. I want him back. I've never been alone this long in my whole life. I've always had friends or family with me, this is so new. It's just me and my book and the long night.

Ugh, 3:37 am. I am so tired! 

I just spent the last 6 hours with Sebastian and Rob. Really random but we had a good time. It was a really good stress free night and I liked sitting in the car with just Sebass while Rob was busy. Rob forgot about us (he was very drunk) and caught a bus home. Sebass and I didn't even realize how long we were talking for in the car. I kept watching for Rob but didn't ever see him so we kept waiting and talking long after Rob left.

It's definitely weird to hang out with Jamies friends when Jamie isn't even in the city though.  Like I said, very random.
I miss Jamie and James. My Grandma felt bad for me that they're away, because she could tell how much I missed them by the things I was saying to her about how we're a family.

omfg...I cannot eat junk food anymore. I have the worst stomach pains right now from bloating and I hate it. There's no way I'll relax tonight! :(
I'm drinking fennel seed tea and contemplating taking a bath to help my tummy.

I also saw Paranormal Activity and it really didn't give me that lingering fear after the movie. It was okay.

I also dressed my Garm icon up for Halloween! :)